Excuses, excuses

So, if you've been wondering where I've been the last two months, the answer is probably "sitting here, not doing anything." However, the answer I'm going to go with is that I've been working with my crew over at www.gamer-station.net. You guys should check it out, yo. We at GS promise to deliver at least mediocre gaming information on a semi-regular basis. w007!

I Must Destroy This Man, And Steal His Existence

So, I'm listening to The Corrs today. (Yes, I listen to The Corrs. Yes, I'm comfortable with that.) And, as I was doing so, I looked at the cover of the album. (VH1 Presents: The Corrs - Live in Dublin; I'm not sure what VH1 has to do with anything, but they did present this CD to me, so I suppose I should be grateful for that.) Anyway, I realized that the luckiest man alive is the one guy in The Corrs. Seriously, that guy hangs around with three good looking Irish ladies on a regular basis. If any of you out there in interweb land know me, you know that that is pretty much my dream existence.

I mean, I like the ladies. I like the Irish. I'm somewhat fond of the number three. Three Irish ladies? That's just freaking sweet.

You'll notcie that I didn't spend the time on this post to look up the name of that guy from The Corrs, because that would just make taking over his very existence that much less challenging, and thus that much less rewarding. However, I am lazy, so I will instead probably just listen to more Corrs.

Goodbye, Ruby Tuesday.

Who can hang a name on you?

I mean, seriously, come on.

Time for my "I haven't posted anything in a couple weeks" apology post.

I'm sorry.

Pfft. Not really.

I am almost done with school for the year. That's pretty cool. But, it also means that I'll have to be home with my family and working at Sentry. Yeah, that's not fun. However, Scott and I are going to go to a Bascom Hill show. They're a really good local band from Madison. They seem to be on the verge of breaking out into the national musci scene, which is pretty crazy, because that never happens to any of the crazy little indie bands I like. And Basom's one of my favorites, especially since my mom used to work with one of the guys from it, and I've been a fan since waaaay back when they called themselves Tasty Wanton. The guy from the band that my mom knew let her have one of their demo CDs, and I've been hooked ever since. If you get a chance to see these guys, go for it.

Well, that's all the barely funny tripe I'm going to subject you all to this time.

Have fun with whatever it is you do.

Are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Following the emo crap that was my last post, raelien enquired as to whether or not survival was a rquirement. As we've always been open for questions here at Crap: the Blog, I will now field that one, and I will use lots of quotes to do so, so as to lessen my own work.

Woody Allen once said, "I don't want to achieve immortality through my work, I want to achieve it through not dying." However, it was Collete who said, "The total absence of humor renders life impossible." A conundrum. Therefore, since I cannot die, and we need humor, we must go on to Mel Brooks: "Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die."

Priceless.

"Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of the humorless."
- Robert Benchly

P.S. I'm in Macbeth this weekend. Please wish me many broken limbs.

Two and fifty of the mornevening

Yeah, so I should be writing a paper right now, but i can't make myself do it just yet, so, here I am.

Allow me to wax philosophical for a bit. (I do this at this time of day.) I find it amazing how much abuse the human body can actually take. I'm pretty sure I'm chronically deprived of sleep this week, and yet I continue to be able to make my body forge forward through yet another all-nighter. I churn out word after word, paragraph after paragraph, papers flowing from my mind to my fingers to the keyboard to the screen. Hours of this. Listening to my music. Dashboard Confessional resounds while I analyze the poetry of E.E. Cummings. My desk lamp casts strange shadows on my keyboard, and outside the circle of its light everything is blurred. I am the center of the sphere of light that is my universe. Zen poetry. Images from my evening or morning or whatnot: MountainDewAcetaminophenWristwatch. A thirty sided die reflects the the glow of a Light Emitting Diode on the keyboard of the computer I'm using to write a paper about poetry. I blog it.

I am Pangeek.

Now all I need to do is be funny.

Did you know that somebody reads this crap?

So, it turns out I get an average of ten page hits a week that aren't me!

That means that like two people read this!

Maybe even three!

Or four!

I love you guys.

But seriously, what the heck. Now I feel all responsible for updating and stuff, and being all funny and whatever. Man, the nerve of you people.

Go home.

Oh, and rae, I refuse to acknowledge that you're stalking me.

Crap!

Spring Fever - Diagnosis: Botulism

So, it's spring, which entails several interseting things.

Some of these things I like, like pretty girls in warm weather clothing. (See: not much!)

Some of these things I do not like, like said warm weather gear clad females sucking face with guys who are not me. (Ho-hum.)

And now, I shall cease to whine.

Enjoy your silence while it lasts.

P.S. Ladies, you know where to find me.

So I said,

"If geekiness were Kool-Aid, I'd be breaking through a wall shouting, 'Oh yeah!'"

Once again, too long.

Far too long between posts once more. Meh, it's not like I actually care. I'm just kidding. But, seriously.

So, events recap since last post:
1. My birthday. I'm nineteen. This means nothing. I did get a microwave.
2. All clothing for a quarter sale at Treasure Haus. (New Ulm's own thrift store) Pretty sure fulfilled one of the better fortune cookie fortunes of all time: "You will get some new clothes."
3. St. Patrick's day. As #1 means squat, and I'm not at home ot get Irish dinner, this pretty much wasn't that cool. I wore a "Kiss me, I'm Irish" button all day, and no one did.

Now is the part of the post where I usually make some keen sarcastic observation. Or something. It might just be gas. That's it, light from a weather sattelite reflecting off swamp gas. I knew it! I blame Sputnik! That foul commie metal basketball of doom!

Now is the time is the post where I make a random comment, and sign off.

You loser.

Long time no update, hey folks? Only 4 shopping days left until my birthday.

Things I would like:

• A million dollars
• My own spaceship
• To be able to come up with jokes that I didn't steal from Strongbad

Today I went to some thirft stores with Tyler Petersen. I bought a shirt that says "Marko" on it. It's a polo. It's Marko's polo. It's a Marko Polo. In related news, I linked TP's website over on the side there.

You waited a long time for this update.

Don't you feel bad that this is all you get?

You loser.

Meeting of the Minds

There was a mandatory dorm meeting tonight. The following image pretty much sums it up.



Heh.

I am soooo lazy.

So I haven't updated yet this month. Whatever. I've been informed that today is one of those "holidays" people seem to prattle on about. From my research I've managed to discover that it is in fact TWO "holidays" today. Today is, first, National Ferris Wheel Day, and, secondly:

ARIZONA'S BIRTHDAY!

Happy Birthday Arizona!

I didn't get you anything. I mean, it's hard enough to buy a gift for a state, (talk about someone who has everything) but it was also on late notice, and upon checking my assets today, I've discovered that I have exactly $43.86 to my name. That is not very much. And frankly, Arizona, your stupid birthday isn't enough to make me want to spend one dime of it. There, I said it. I am not particularly fond of Arizona. Or Texas. Oklahoma is OK, but I don't really enjoy its company either.

Okay, okay, I really do know what holiday it is.

It's Drew Bledsoe's birthday!

That's not it either?

Maybe it has something to do with this:

Merry Christmas, everyone!

It's Nap-thirty!

Long time since my last update, it seems to me.
Busy, busy, busy.
About many ducks I have many men to see,
Busy, busy, busy.
I ate no food until quarter to three.
Busy, busy, busy.
I'm not sure why this update is poetry.
Maybe.
It may be.

That I'm busy, busy, busy.

P.S. Ok, so maybe inflicting poetry on you is a little cruel. Fine, here, take this.

Sundae Sunday: Sunday

For you Pinky and the Brain fans (See: people after my own heart) out there, I give you this. Do with it what you will.

The phrase that will make you look and sound more like a loser than anything else I've come up with in my entire lifetime: "I'm SO blogging this."

I forgot what it was, too.

I'm sad now.

Ice cream is good.

EDIT: Linked Be Like the sqURL, by my BEST FRIEND Kaleb, and also added a link to the BEST WEB BROWSER EVER

Today I'm Feeling: Inadequate

So, I have this day calendar that's all miniature paper airplanes. It's pretty cool, though generally all that happens to them is getting thrown at my roomate a couple times, then just laying wherever they last landed, much like my food supply. (Which is another story entirely.) So yeah, tiny paper airplanes. (Black Ninja Squirrel knows where you sleep.) Umm... I had a point about the whole paper airplane thing, but now I forgot. That's kind of annoying.

So, anyway, I realized today that I essentially lived the last week of my life in an area roughly the size of a city block. Somehow, this doesn't bother me. Meh.

Oh yeah! So this day calendar. Yeah. The thing is currently two days behind, cause I'm too lazy to reach over and break the crappy adhesive bond that attaches the paper to the calendar so that it can actually say the right day. I mean, it takes two seconds and I can't even do it more than once every three or four days. I am sooooooo cool. (Black Ninja Squirrel, on the other hand, knows where you sleep.) So, yeah. RAWK OUT!

So, have you ever been in one of those situations where this person does something and you feel someway about it and you want to take some action and maybe you do or maybe you don't do it, and then something happens, or not and the other person does something else, or maybe the same thing again, or maybe does nothing, or maybe says something about something in a manner that may or may not indicate that they feel some sort of way about a subject that's possibly related to the matter at hand, or maybe something else.

I totally feel someway about that.

Cheese crackers rule the world. (Black Ninja Squirrel knows where you sleep.)

The Frozen Lands of Nadisota

So, I'm here at MLC. As the French say, "Voila!" At least I think that's what they say. I don't know French and I don't listen when the French speak. But it's cool to make fun of France, and I'm nothing if not cool. I am deeply sarcastic.

So yeah, in classic me fashion, my first full day at MLC involved me getting the wrong time for my orientation meeting and missing pretty much all of it. Meh. I got back in time to get free food, so that's cool. My schedule may kill me, I'm not sure yet. I do know that I'm sitting on 19 credits, so, yeah.

I've met approximately everyone in the last couple of days, and my already limited capacity to remember names is severely overwhelmed by the whole thing. We did a getting to know your classmates thing in my speech class today. When it came time to name off everyone, I remembered the names of approximately four people.

In other news, we were forced to eat Robin's minstrels.

And there was much rejoicing.

EDIT: Linked Reality's Remnant. I don't agree with some of the stuff he says, but it sure sounds cool when he says it, the silly Helenvillian.